Cyprus

Category F / fast-track permanent residency via ~€300k property investment, or temporary 'pink slip' route with modest income proof.

Non-EU buyers need routine council approval, one property up to ~4,000m² — in practice smooth.

GESY national system (post-2019) transformed access; private care excellent and cheap; Nicosia/Limassol standard high.

Fiber widely available in towns.

Near-universal — British colonial legacy means English contracts, courts familiarity, medicine.

Cheaper than most of the EU-Med; Limassol is the pricey exception (finance money).

Among the EU's lowest crime rates.

Good roads, reliable utilities, modern hospitals — UK-standard systems with more sun.

Minimal buses, no rail — fully car-dependent.

Good roads, light traffic, left-side driving (UK legacy).

UTC+2: ~3h of a 9–5 Pacific workday falls in local waking hours.

EU standard; expat-vet infrastructure everywhere.

Stable (the division is frozen, not hot).

Water scarcity managed; development pressure on coasts.

Ancient sites over living scene.

Meze forever, plus decent international in Limassol/Paphos.

Fair value outside Limassol's finance-fueled towers; Paphos remains affordable.

The far corner of the Med — two hops from most of the US.

Naturalization at 7–8 years (shorter with high Greek proficiency); dual OK.

Huge British retiree infrastructure that Americans slot into easily.

Civil unions recognized; traditional Orthodox society, tolerant in practice in expat towns.

Moderate seismic zone; summer drought and heat intensifying.

Medical legal (2019); recreational illegal — small possession can still bite. Not the island for Amy's filter.

The headline: foreign pension income taxed at a flat 5% (above €3,420 exemption), no inheritance tax, 60-day non-dom rules for the wealthy. Elite retiree tax treatment.